Sometimes there are tragedies that completely shake your life. Such has been the case with losing our boy. I’m finding that if the shaking is hard enough it will shatter your heart into a million pieces. Life then becomes a process of picking up those pieces and putting your heart back together. I am convinced that how you view God completely determines what kind of heart you will have once it is all over. Your perception of God is absolutely defining in those times. Who is God? An angry Grinch? A good Father or an unapproachable one? Knowing God’s attributes is crucial to putting your heart back together. The problem then, is that in trial our [...]

"Courage is not simply one of the virtues but the form of every virtue at the testing point, which means at the point of highest reality." - C.S. Lewis Today was the hardest day of my life. I watched my wife give birth to our lifeless child today. I saw the bravest person I've ever known in the eyes of my best friend. Today we said hello and goodbye to our son in the same breath, for this side of Heaven. I fell in love all over again. With God and with my wife. I can't wait to see my boy again: on the other side, where we'll never have to say goodbye again. Thank you [...]

I may not understand, But I will trust in you The billows of this wave Lead me back to You… As an artist with an overactive creative mind, these words popped into my head around 4:00 pm yesterday, along with a melody. I was driving from the reservation to the mountain hospital after receiving a call to come in. Marissa was feeling some strange cramping coming from our baby in her belly, and her doctor wanted her to go to the OB to get it checked out. My 30 minute drive was half an intercession meeting with God and half being sick out of my mind not knowing the full picture yet. We lost a child [...]

One thing that I have learned in listening/centering prayer is that there is a "Forgotten One" in me. Broken pieces, scary places, that as I allow God to come and do His bidding inside of me and minister to me, my heart is changed in humility, love and gratitude. There are times when I have felt alone, desolate and abandoned, that God not only got me through but knows what it is like first hand. Philippians 2:5-11Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a [...]